By Ann Coulter

After the monstrous shooting in Arizona last week surely we can all agree that weve got to pass Obamas agenda immediately and stop using metaphors.
At least I think thats what the mainstream media are trying to tell me.
Liberals instantly leapt on the sickening massacre at a Tucson political event over the weekend to accuse tea partiers Sarah Palin and all conservatives who talk out loud of being complicit in murder by inspiring the shooter Jared Loughner.
Of course to make their case they first must demonstrate:
(a) Right-wingers have called for violence against anyone especially conservative pro-Second Amendment Democratic congresswomen;
(b) Loughner was listening to them; and
(c) Loughner was influenced by them.
Theyve proved none of this. In fact its nearly the opposite.
Needless to say no conservative has called for violence against anyone. Nor has any conservative engaged in any rhetoric that was likely to lead to violence. Every putative example of violent rhetoric these squeamish liberals produce keeps being matched by an identical example from the Democrats.
Sarah Palin for example had a chart of congressional districts being targeted by Republicans. So did the Democratic Leadership Committee. Indeed Democratic consultant Bob Beckel went on Fox News and said he invented the bulls-eye maps.
Similarly every time liberals produce an example of military lingo from a Republican -- were going to target this district -- Republicans produce five more from the Democrats.
President whose asses to kick Obama predicted hand-to-hand combat with his political opponents and has made such remarks as if they bring a knife to the fight we bring a gun -- making Obama the first American president to advocate gun fights since Andrew Jackson.
These are figures of speech known as metaphors. (Do liberals know where we got the word campaign?)
Its not that both sides did something wrong; neither side did anything wrong. The drama queens need to settle down.
The winner of the most cretinous statement of 2011 -- and the list is now closed so please hold your submissions -- is MSNBCs Chris Matthews who on Monday night recalled Palins statement Were not retreating were reloading and said I quote THATS not a metaphor.
Really Chris? If thats not a metaphor who did she shoot?
By blaming a mass killing on figures of speech liberals sound as crazy as Loughner with his complaints about peoples grammar. Maybe in lieu of dropping all metaphors liberals should demand we ban metonyms so that tragedies like this will never happen again.
As for Loughner being influenced by tea partiers Fox News and talk radio -- oops another dead-end. According to all available evidence Loughner is a liberal.
Every friend of Loughner who has characterized his politics has described him as liberal. Not one called him a conservative.
One friend says Loughner never listened to talk radio or watched the TV news. Throw in never read books and you have the dictionary definition of a liberal. Being completely uninformed is precisely how most liberals stay liberal.
According to voluminous Twitter postings on Saturday by one of Loughners friends since high school Caitie Parker he was left wing a political radical quite liberal and a pot head.
If any public figure influenced this guy my moneys on Bill Maher.
But liberals have been so determined to exploit this tragedy to geld conservatives they have told calculated lies about Loughners politics.
In the most bald-faced lie I have ever read in The New York Times -- which is saying something -- that paper implied Loughner is a pro-life zealot. This is the precise opposite of the truth.
Only because numerous other news outlets including ABC News and The Associated Press reported the exact same shocking incident in much greater detail -- and with direct quotes -- do we know that the Times rendition was complete bunk.
ABC News reported: One Pima Community College student who had a poetry class with Loughner later in his college career said he would often act wildly inappropriate.
One day (Loughner) started making comments about terrorism and laughing about killing the baby classmate Don Coorough told ABC News referring to a discussion about abortions. The rest of us were looking at him in shock ... I thought this young man was troubled.
Another classmate Lydian Ali recalled the incident as well.
A girl had written a poem about an abortion. It was very emotional and she was teary eyed and he said something about strapping a bomb to the fetus and making a baby bomber Ali said.
Heres the Times version: After another student read a poem about getting an abortion Mr. Loughner compared the young woman to a terrorist for killing the baby.
So thats how the Times transformed Loughner from a sicko laughing about a dead fetus to a deadly earnest pro-life fanatic. (Never believe a news story written by Eric Lipton Charlie Savage or Scott Shane of The New York Times -- or for simplicity anything in the Times.)
I wouldnt have mentioned Loughners far-left world view immediately after a tragedy like this but now that liberals have opened the door by blaming Loughners politics they better brace themselves.
And when I say brace themselves I dont mean they need to actually strap themselves into a brace. Thats a metaphor Chris.
Ann Coulter is a columnist and author of Guilty: Liberal Victims and Their Assault On America.