A bunch of aggrieved women led by Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg launched a high-profile public service campaign this week to ban the word bossy. Sandberg Beyonce Victoria Posh Spice Beckham and first lady Michelle Obama have joined femme forces to combat this phantom menace. In their rarefied world its a very negative experience and a crippling act of gender discrimination to be called bossy. This isnt a word we should use Sandberg complained on National Public Radio.
To which I say: Oh buck up.
The key to female empowerment doesnt lie with wheedling word police. It lies with girls and women finding the courage to speak and act on their beliefs and principles without regard to their detractors opinions.
My message to girls including my own 13-year-old daughter is not: Ban Bossy. My message is: Be Bossy. And that means first being the boss of you.
Here is my own little story. Over the past 20 years I have gained a reputation as mouthy aggressive overbearing and yes bossy. Ive barreled my way through interviews on The View and the Today show arguing over Joy Behar and Matt Lauer. Ive battled with some of the biggest blowhards in politics media and Hollywood.
But I wasnt always this way. In grade school I was shy to the point of verbal paralysis. I failed a speech class because I was terrified to stand up in class with 30 sets of eyes staring at me. I was a doormat and a wallflower not because I was afraid of being labeled pushy or bossy but because I was afraid of owning my own thoughts beliefs and work.
What changed? In college I got sick of other people -- especially ahem of bossy liberal white women -- pretending to speak for me. I learned to say no when everyone around me expected and demanded yes. I learned to cut my own path and not give a damn whether anyone followed. I wasnt held back by how others perceived me. I was held back by how I perceived myself.
Sandberg and her friends think bossy (which she calls the other b-word) is worth ginning up an entire media campaign over -- even enlisting White House officials and cabinet members. But women with unpopular ideas and opinions face a daily barrage of unprintable c-words f-words s-words and w-words that are far worse. If we launched media campaigns to ban every ugly word that comes our way we wouldnt have time to get anything else done.
It is a blessing to be able to make a living exercising the First Amendment. It would be an absolute waste of those precious free speech rights for any woman to pull her punches for fear of gasp an adjective.
Girls heres the truth about the Ban Bossy campaign: Its being spearheaded by a privileged group of elite feminists who have a very vested interest in stoking victim politics and exacerbating the gender divide. They actually encourage dependency and groupthink while paying lip service to empowerment and self-determination. They traffic in bogus wage disparity statistics whitewashing the fact that whats actually left of that dwindling pay gap is due to the deliberate voluntary choices women in the workforce make. This includes which industries women enter how long they stay what levels they attain and when and how they decide to start a family.
The supposedly abhorrent unequal outcomes that progressive women want to eradicate dont always come down to sexism. Its not just a gender thing. Its a freedom thing.
I want young girls and young ladies to know that whatever adversity you might face there has never been a better time to be an American woman. You have more educational economic and entrepreneurial opportunities than generations of women before you. You have more flexibility more choices and more ways to spread your messages and make yourself heard than ever before.
Dont just be bossy. Be your own boss. When I started two Internet companies I didnt ask for anyones permission. I didnt let anyone stop me. I didnt wallow in self-pity about the odds stacked against me or the derision that greeted me. And when times were tough I didnt blame The Man. I woman-ed up.
Gals you dont need the sensitivity brigade to protect you from criticism or attacks. You need to learn from them and rise above them not censor them. And if anyone tells you to tone it down do the opposite: Crank it up and dont look back. Thats an order!
Michelle Malkin is the author of Culture of Corruption: Obama and his Team of Tax Cheats Crooks & Cronies (Regnery 2010).
A bunch of aggrieved women led by Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg launched a high-profile public service campaign this week to ban the word bossy. Sandberg Beyonce Victoria Posh Spice Beckham and first lady Michelle Obama have joined femme forces to combat this phantom menace. In their rarefied world its a very negative experience and a crippling act of gender discrimination to be called bossy. This isnt a word we should use Sandberg complained on National Public Radio.
To which I say: Oh buck up.
The key to female empowerment doesnt lie with wheedling word police. It lies with girls and women finding the courage to speak and act on their beliefs and principles without regard to their detractors opinions.
My message to girls including my own 13-year-old daughter is not: Ban Bossy. My message is: Be Bossy. And that means first being the boss of you.
Here is my own little story. Over the past 20 years I have gained a reputation as mouthy aggressive overbearing and yes bossy. Ive barreled my way through interviews on The View and the Today show arguing over Joy Behar and Matt Lauer. Ive battled with some of the biggest blowhards in politics media and Hollywood.
But I wasnt always this way. In grade school I was shy to the point of verbal paralysis. I failed a speech class because I was terrified to stand up in class with 30 sets of eyes staring at me. I was a doormat and a wallflower not because I was afraid of being labeled pushy or bossy but because I was afraid of owning my own thoughts beliefs and work.
What changed? In college I got sick of other people -- especially ahem of bossy liberal white women -- pretending to speak for me. I learned to say no when everyone around me expected and demanded yes. I learned to cut my own path and not give a damn whether anyone followed. I wasnt held back by how others perceived me. I was held back by how I perceived myself.
Sandberg and her friends think bossy (which she calls the other b-word) is worth ginning up an entire media campaign over -- even enlisting White House officials and cabinet members. But women with unpopular ideas and opinions face a daily barrage of unprintable c-words f-words s-words and w-words that are far worse. If we launched media campaigns to ban every ugly word that comes our way we wouldnt have time to get anything else done.
It is a blessing to be able to make a living exercising the First Amendment. It would be an absolute waste of those precious free speech rights for any woman to pull her punches for fear of gasp an adjective.
Girls heres the truth about the Ban Bossy campaign: Its being spearheaded by a privileged group of elite feminists who have a very vested interest in stoking victim politics and exacerbating the gender divide. They actually encourage dependency and groupthink while paying lip service to empowerment and self-determination. They traffic in bogus wage disparity statistics whitewashing the fact that whats actually left of that dwindling pay gap is due to the deliberate voluntary choices women in the workforce make. This includes which industries women enter how long they stay what levels they attain and when and how they decide to start a family.
The supposedly abhorrent unequal outcomes that progressive women want to eradicate dont always come down to sexism. Its not just a gender thing. Its a freedom thing.
I want young girls and young ladies to know that whatever adversity you might face there has never been a better time to be an American woman. You have more educational economic and entrepreneurial opportunities than generations of women before you. You have more flexibility more choices and more ways to spread your messages and make yourself heard than ever before.
Dont just be bossy. Be your own boss. When I started two Internet companies I didnt ask for anyones permission. I didnt let anyone stop me. I didnt wallow in self-pity about the odds stacked against me or the derision that greeted me. And when times were tough I didnt blame The Man. I woman-ed up.
Gals you dont need the sensitivity brigade to protect you from criticism or attacks. You need to learn from them and rise above them not censor them. And if anyone tells you to tone it down do the opposite: Crank it up and dont look back. Thats an order!
Michelle Malkin is the author of Culture of Corruption: Obama and his Team of Tax Cheats Crooks & Cronies (Regnery 2010).
