Democrats love the idea that conservatives are really into conspiracy theories. That might actually be the biggest conspiracy theory floating around these days, especially if you watch MSNBC. And if you do watch MSNBC, in addition to having my sincerest condolences for whatever horrible things happened in your childhood to make you hate yourself so much, you are now being introduced to a brand new conspiracy theory: the “fake polls to pervert the average of polls” gambit.
Admittedly, the name needs a little work. But it is an apt description of the raw sewage flowing from the rear end of the peacock on a regular basis.
Before we get to what it is in detail, I have to note the hilarity of a network that employs Rachel Maddow, albeit only one day per week, and pays her $30 million per year (again, for working one day per week), birthing the idea that any other organization is involved in conspiracy theories. The yarn and thumbtack budget for Maddow has to be half her salary just so various, disparate things can be tied together in her rambling, tinfoil monologues. The New York Times once whined that Tucker Carlson’s monologues were getting longer, yet they never noted how Maddow’s entire show can be one. Her level of paranoia is Olympic in scope, presumably resulting in her waking up from night terrors of Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump putting extra fluoride in her water.
A stoner living next to cop has never been as paranoid as Rachel Maddow is on any day ending in “y.” But there is an audience for it, with Maddow being the only thing on MSNBC that sniffs the top 10 of cable news on the day she works. Liberals love conspiracy theories and seem to genuinely believe some of the dumbest ideas ever cooked up. You have to admire that, somewhat, at least through the pity.
That concoction of admiration for an ability to ignore reality coupled with the pity of watching a junkie argue with a mailbox and lose is what the Joy Reid show is. They call it “The Reid Out,” which I have to assume is clever. The whole crew comes off as people who laugh repeatedly as the same puns, mistaking them for inside jokes because they don’t understand the concept.
Concepts are one thing that fall just beyond the grasp of everyone associated with the show, especially this host Joy. As beautiful as she is intelligent – Forrest Gump with a bleached Moe from the Three Stooges haircut – and as honest as the day is short. God is a perfect being, but next to the platypus, Joy Reid is the one creation of his that makes you question it. Maybe he had a box of leftover parts he just couldn’t bring himself to toss out and gave the world irony in the form of someone named Joy?
We can’t know God’s plan, but sometimes you have to wonder if he even does. She’s the velvet painting of Elvis on cable news, seemingly working only to have people listen to her words in wonderment as to why they exist.
Well, Joy has herself a conspiracy theory and it is a doozy. After multiple election cycles where polling radically undercounted Republican support, she would now like people to believe conservatives are cooking the books in polling, spending untold millions (polling ain’t cheap) to conduct bogus polls in the hope of skewing the average of polls on the 538 blog and Real Clear Politics. If that sounds not only very expensive but wildly elaborate that’s only because it is. (Watch her lay it out here, it’s very convoluted.
Why do this? Reid seems to believe having the average of polls favoring Republicans will make Democrats stay home on election day. In other words: voter suppression.
Yes, that’s incredibly stupid. I did mention we’re dealing with Joy Reid here, right? Stupid is her currency.
But it’s not really all that stupid, from a business model for MSNBC point of view. After the Mueller Report was released, MSNBC’s ratings dropped. Their viewers realized they’d been lied to for 2 and a half years about Russian collusion, that Mueller wasn’t going to “get” Donald Trump. They weren’t really excited about having been lied to for ratings and became demoralized. They came back, choosing being lied to over reality because reality is no friend of the left, but the lesson was learned: don’t oversell your lies or your audience could leave you, even for a while.
Joy Reid doesn’t have much of an audience – mostly left-wing suburban housewives in loveless marriages with no kids at home, drinking their afternoons away and desperate for any kind of attention who get the thrill of a tiny spark by being called racist; it’s a safe form of BDSM for numb leisure class members. She can’t afford to lose any of them.
By spinning a conspiracy of “voter suppression by poll averages,” Reid is setting up an excuse for losses by people like Stacey Abrams, someone Reid has personally propped up and sold her audience for four years. Reid has likely cost her audience millions in campaign contributions and book sales for Abrams, if Stacey loses something has to be blamed, it can’t be that the people of Georgia simply weren’t interested because that would make Joy Reid and pretty much everyone at MSNBC a liar.
It’s a testament to just how far gone the left is that voter suppression by poll averages is the best they could come up with. Who bases their lives on something a tiny fraction of the public even has any idea about? If you’re a reader of the 538 blog or Real Clear Politics you are likely engaged in politics and aren’t going to let anything stop you from voting. If you aren’t a reader, you likely have no idea what the average of polls even means, so the idea that it would suppress turnout is absurd.
Absurd is all Democrats have left.
The left needs to elevate obscure or completely unknown people to accuse the entire right of embracing conspiracies, all we have to do is show exactly what their “leaders” are saying. So laugh at them, mock them, they deserve all of it. But never let anyone forget who the true conspiracy theorist are. And vote against every single one of them, up and down the ballot.
Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!), host of a daily radio show, and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.
